Scene: A 50-something year old patient with emphysema and chronic bronchitis lingers around the workstation, waiting for discharge paperwork after an hour or so of continuous neb treatments allowed him to narrowly avoid intubation.
Pt: "Yo, can I go grab a smoke while I wait?"
Attending, Resident, Nurse, and Me: "NO!"
3 comments:
You can treat the symptoms but there's just no cure for stupid.
For next time:
"Yes, on one condition. That you never come back to this hospital again. We do not have the facilities or technology to truly help you."
Just don't mention there's not a hospital in the world that fits the bill.
We also had a copd,chf patient ask us to let them smoke before being taken into the hospital.
EEEK!
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