Tuesday, April 6, 2010

Triage Highlights

Direct quotes are often the best way to convey a patient's chief complaint. Case in point: "I ain't got no money for a pregnancy test."

* * *

Need directions to the ER? Call our main number. Do not call to schedule an ambulance to pick you up, to inquire about a patient's medical status, or my personal favorite, call from out of state because you realized that the medication you just took expired two days ago and you're worried you might be dying.

* * *

What you see if what you get. This may come as a surprise, but we do not have a secret stash of vending machines hidden in the waiting room. I know you may prefer a particular brand of soft drink, but sadly, the Big City hospital has apparently contracted with a rival company. This fact will not change no matter how many times you ask.

No comments: