Deal or No Deal

I've heard EtOHers made some pretty outlandish claims over the years - "I'm best friends with the President of the United States," "I can kick your ass," "I'm not drunk."

But one particularly vocal intoxicated patient from the other night insisted that he had $5,000 on him and that he would use it to pay for an early discharge.

He really did have a wad of cash to use as a visual aide in support of his boasting, but when I went to check his vital signs, I noted with great disappointment that it was made mostly of singles.

It's a real shame, too. I gotta pay for med school somehow.