Stats from Friday night...
2008: The age, more or less, of our crying psych patient if she did, as she claimed, kill Jesus.
464: The critically high blood sugar of our drug-seeking diabetic who rode her power scooter in from the next town over to score some Percocets, while refusing treatment for her diabetes.
2: The number of crash intubations performed on patients who unexpectedly lost their airways.
0: Net balance of naked patients. EMS delivered a naked, jaundiced patient in liver failure shortly after our trauma patient escaped by running out the ambulance bay doors and leaving his clothes behind.
-1: The loss to our roster of regular drunks after one died this week following injuries sustained in a fall.